As described in the weekend TV guide of The Southall Gazette, published Friday 12th November 1982: “5.20 MURUN BUCHSTANSANGUR. Original animated series featuring a smelly, disgusting, but irresistible creature that lives in a crack beneath the kitchen cupboard”.
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From The Archives: Denis Norden’s Trailer Cinema, ITV (LWT), 1992
From the Liverpool Echo, Saturday 28th November 1992:
CONFESSION time.
Denis Norden, the man who’s viewed more boobs on television than the Board of Film Censors, has an admission. He’s terrified of studio audiences.
Yep. He says he “loathes” presenting, becomes “traumatised with panic” and would much prefer to take a back seat. But he can’t.
He comes up with ideas for shows and because no-one else wants to perform his brand of “mild humour”, he says he ends up in the hot seat. Somewhere he would prefer not to be.
It was he who dreamed up the format for the hugely successful It’ll Be All Right on the Night series that revealed the mistakes that never made it on air, and ran to more parts than the Rocky or Nightmare on Elm Street films.
Now he’s come up with vet another format for a show – and again he’s drawn the short straw when it comes to presenting.
Denis Norden’s Trailer Cinema (tonight, ITV, 9.05 pm) unearths the naff and the novel, the nauseating and nasty trailers that attempted to draw audiences to the B-movies of the 50s and 60s.
The makers of B-movies knew that they weren’t likely to get bums on seats solely on the strength of their (usually awful) films, so they had to entice people to the cinema. Hence the imaginative trailers that even went so far as to show scenes that never actually featured in the movie.
Denis Norden trawled through more than 2,000 trailers, selecting his favourite 100 for this hour long special. Watch out for the references to sex, and the introduction of “new” faces Joan Collins, Sean Connery and Leonard Nimoy.
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A Lesson, And What To Do Now
I met a traveller from an antique land,
Who said—“Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. . . . Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them, and the heart that fed;
And on the pedestal, these words appear:
My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings;
Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal Wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.”
— Percy Bysshe ShelleyYou may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.
— Maya Angelou -
She Thinks She’s (Seen) Hexham Head(s)
(Jumpscare at 7:57…)
FURTHER EVIDENCE BELOW, JUST BEFORE 15 SECONDS IN!…
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Quote For The Day, And The Year
“Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree.” – Anon
(The above is widely attributed to Martin Luther, although it apparently only dates back to 1944 – a date that makes more sense given the implications.)
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POLL: Good Idea or Bad Idea?
THE IDEA: A cover version of “Let’s Get Physical” by Olivia Newton John, only it has been renamed “Let’s Get Liminal”. There are no other differences.
INSULT THE GREEN SQUARE BELOW IF YOU WANT TO VOTE “NOT SURE”
GLARE AT THE ORANGE SQUARE BELOW IF YOU WANT TO VOTE “DON’T”
The poll results will appear in the blank space above on 3rd November 2085.
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Orman Osgood
Orman Osgood just stands there
Every day in our town square
Orman Osgood stands and waits
At the blue grey iron gatesOrman Osgood never speaks
Never sings or shouts or shrieks
Orman Osgood stands and stares
As life goes by in this town squareOrman Osgood looks through the bars
Through the gate into the yard
There’s nothing there for him to see
Or is something hidden from you and me?What is he waiting for? Why is he there?
Day after day in our town square
Never seems to go home at night
Still standing there at dawn’s first lightOrman Osgood’s talked about,
Argued over, day in, day out,
Orman Osgood’s always news
In the absence of any cluesOrman Osgood is photographed
Phones held high as tourists laugh
Orman Osgood never reacts
To the circus that he attractsOrman Osgood still stands there
Every day in our town square
Orman Osgood stands and waits
At the blue grey iron gates -
Artificial Idiotic Art: Miyazaki Figured Out How Awful AI Was In 2016
I remember seeing this clip go viral when it was originally uploaded. I was astounded then, as now, why this company thought it was a great idea to show Hayao Miyazaki a grotesque shambling data-creature and assume he’d give it the thumbs up. The phrase “This is an insult to life itself” needs to branded across the foreheads of everyone in the tech industry.
